Hello, I’m Kim and I’m a Webaholic

I’m addicted. To the internet.

I try and think back to what I did before this… I can’t recall. I love checking my email. How in God’s name did people wait DAYS for a letter from someone? DAYS?! If someone tells me they are sending me an email, I get annoyed after like seven minutes. I just bought something online and the first thing I did was “Check Order Status” to see when it might get here. I’m hoping by Wednesday (today is Friday). In other words, if I have to wait more than a week, I’m going to be aggravated. (Did you ever order anything from a comic book or a magazine for kids when you were young? I ordered some of them damned Sea Monkeys and waited 4-6 weeks for them fuckers…).

I have about half a dozen sites I check regularly. (Just for the hell of it, they are):

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Woopig.net [a Razorback sports site… plus a lot more]
  • Troll Lord Games [a RPG site run by some guys I know]
  • 4815162342.com [a LOST fansite]
  • Ellusionist.com [a magic website]

I sometimes saunter over to Iambored.com or Cracked.com. I check my email. I do other stuff. Then I check them again. Ya know, just because someone may have posted something in the last 23 minutes.

Someone help me.

Oh, truth be told, I do watch videos on the computer. I ‘procure’ movies and TV shows and watch them sitting at my desk. Arrested Development may be the funniest TV show ever. Curb Your Enthusiasm is hilarious. You are probably already aware of my obsession with LOST. I even watched the old Conan movie sitting here a few weeks back. But the internet always calls my name. Like the Sirens Song to a lonely sailor…

Oh you bitches...

I’ll try to leave you, you foul temptress. I’ll fling words of anger at you and insist I don’t need you. I’ll walk away, turn on the TV… read a book. Hell, I might even go outside. But we’ll both know. You don’t need me. You’ll go on without me, you’ll be fine. But not me. I’ll come back, just to check my mail. And then I’m done. You’ll win. You do every time. I hate you.

Ooo! I have a new email!

Published in: on February 26, 2010 at 11:46 pm  Comments (7)  

“We Are The World”. No You’re Not.

I remember it like it was yesterday… A bunch of really famous singers released a song to help fight hunger in Africa. The song itself was written by Michael Jackson (in his 1985, non-pedophile, ass-kicking prime) and Lionel Richie (straight on the heels of “Stuck On You“). (more…)

Published in: on February 14, 2010 at 12:05 am  Comments (12)  

Magic: The Art of the Social Misfit

Remember when you were a kid and someone took a quarter out of your ear? It was amazing. Or the guy that could guess your card every time, or make little squishy balls disappear then reappear in mid-air? That was some of the coolest stuff you could imagine. But what happens as you get older? Those uber-cool magicians morph into pseudo-creepy social misfits. Why is that?

Thurston: a 1930s Era Magician

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Published in: on February 10, 2010 at 10:16 am  Comments (3)